Tuesday, 31 March 2015

Fake It Till You Make It: Hipster Cafe (A How To)


With this simple guide, you too can enjoy the atmosphere of a hipster cafe right in the comforts of your own home. Best of all, it's almost absolutely free! No more travelling to inaccessible, dimly-lit cafes with overpriced f&b and no power points. All you need is right here.



What you'll need:

1 device with internet connection
1 cup of coffee or tea (the more pretentious the name, the better)

Step 1:

Open this link. Go on, do it! Now adjust the cafe and rain sounds according to your own preference.

Step 2:

Open spotify, and start playing one of the following playlists:

Your Favourite Coffeehouse
Evening Acoustic
Jazz for Autumn

If these are too mainstream for your hipster palate, feel free to play your own indie playlist featuring artists like mew, tame impala, foals or another band named after an animal. If you're all for #localpride, what about a playlist with Charlie Lim, Gentle Bones and Monster Cat (if you're still going for the animal thing)?

Now, the audio part of your hipster cafe experience is complete. Close your eyes for 30 seconds. If you concentrate hard enough, you can even hear some kids reminiscing about last year's Laneway.

Step 3:

Last and final step. The caffeine. Brew yourself an espresso or cafe latte with beans purchased from a third-wave coffee roaster. Because why would you want to drink anything else right? Tea fiends, you know what to do. Make yourself something flower/berry based, the brighter hues make for better instagram photos. As we all know, a well-taken instagram photo is the greatest legitimisation of any experience.

See what I mean?

Now you're all done! What I love about all this is that the cafe is completely mobile and highly customisable. Don't like rain sounds? Turn it off. Likewise for the cafe chatter. Prefer Kpop over jazz? Go ahead, except your hipster cred goes down. Want to work in a library? Plug your earphones into your laptop, bring coffee/tea in a thermos. Or buy your own drink from good ol' Galilee Cafe (does it still exist?)

Let me know if all this works for you, and if you have other tips to boost the atmosphere. Jokes aside, also comment below if there any real hipster cafes that are affordable, accessible, and worth going to. Starbucks not counted.

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